2019

2019 was literally the worst year of my entire life. From having to leave my job at the Lighthouse, court rooms, and grief I can say 2019 kicked my ass. But it was a huge step up in Sounder land. I finally got to expearience things and have the attention i wanted without attention seeking behavior. I got to spend time with Brett’s kids on and off the train. I became friends with Wendy the female conductor, exchanging recipes with Diane the other female conductor now that she’s back, Sorted out \240some of my stupid Garrett feelings to an extent I suppose, Dennis had two strokes which was depressing and now he’s not an engineer anymore. I got to know Al the engineer, Keven the engineer and Tom the engineer better, and they were the highlight to a very bad year.

Things are on shaker ground right now though. I have not been on the train in over a month. We tarted the new year and I can’t bring myself to go back and. Return home.I feel scared for some reason like I’ll get hurt if I go back. I feel like hey all probably don’t even miss me in spite of me missing them. \240

I feel like going back is pointless because I have let them all down in some way. I promise to try but I just don’t know right now.

Intro to SounderLife.

SounderLife with Kels originated from my previous blog web sight on wordpress back in 2016. I did a not so fantastic job at maintaining my Commuter blog back then. Now I am wanting to recreate it and keep a journal of my favorite train and the staff. Let’s go back in time back where I started SounderLife in2016.

Original blog posts

June 23. 2016

Hello everyone My name is Kels. Just a quick intro about myself so y'all know What you're in for by following my #SounderLife blog.   I am 23 years old and I live in Marysville Washington. I am also ligally blind. That can make life quite interesting at times LOL I am a singer-songwriter and a Railfan. In otherwords i am obsessed with the railroad. With family and friends in the railroading industry I knew a lot of rail slang. The engineers and conductors call people that are obsessed with the railroad  "foamers" because we are people that love the railroad so much we foam at the mouth   Lol. Its sillyness really. But great.  On a more serious note  I am employed down in Seattle and I commute all the way from Marysville four days a week to go to work. Most of the blind and legally blind and deaf blind community are unemployed. I myself have a lot of health problems so there are people that say the odds are against me. But really I still get up in the morning and go to work. I am trying my best and beating those odds.  When I got my current job I was very excited about it. Not just was I stoked about the paycheck, but I was also very excited that basicly this meant every morning and afternoon I got to ride Sounder Commuter rail. This is still to this day my favorite feature of my job. I love my daily train rides. In fact I sometimes go ride on my days off because it is something to do and I love it so much.  As I said above, I have family and friends Who are in the railroad industry. As a matter of fact a huge chunk of my family is in the public transit industry. My father works for public transit, my step mama is a supervisor for public transit, and my uncle is a locomotive engineer for BNSF Railway. He is actually the engineer on the sounder train that I ride every day.  Haha, having connections in the industry is definitely helpful and definitely part of the reason I am known now as the sounder princess. When I first started working and commuting last Autumn, I was really scared of getting lost or getting hurt. I knew riding the sounder train would cheer me up. Of course I threw my uncles name in the circle of his coworkers so they would keep a special eye on me. Yes it was that scary for me that I thought I wanted to be in sounder daycare where they would watch every little thing I did and tell me if I was lost or misslead.  After a while though my uncle's rank and name just became irrelevant. It took me less than a month into this to have all of the conductors wrapped around my little finger. I picked my favorite spot, they would reserve it, they would help me get on and find my spot, talk to me about my day, even sometimes hold my hand when I would get scared. Sounder employees and passengers are the best group you could ride with especially Northline.  Now I know what you all are thinking, Northline always gets canceled during the fall winter and spring when it pours down rain and we have mudslides south of Mukilteo  near Edmonds. So how would we ever even all get to see each other? OK that's a bit of dramatic thinking lol but we'll always look out for each other and we always see each other on the special bus service that sounds transit provides for us unlucky Northline passengers. Lol.  I love riding the Northline train. I love the scenery of the Puget Sound outside, I love my friends, (passengers and employees) and I just love the fact that I get to be independent every day and that in this experience I get to learn all about the railroad in a way that I just love. I get to hear stories from the employees learn about protocol and one of the engineers is giving me a bunch of railroad magazines to read of course I also got a subscription. Lol. This engineer he tells me that you can get DVDs to learn all about how to railRoad. Yeah... I'm in.  One of my friends bought me a tiara to wear on the train because I have the conductors wrapped around my finger and I get away with a lot of silliness and they all just love me. Idk why. Lol maybe because I'm adorable… Anyway... This tiara totally started this trend where passengers and all of my friends started calling me  "the sounder princess". This name has stuck big-time.  So you want to talk shenanigans?... Let's talk shenanigans. Now I have totally grown out of the rebillion stage I was in for about the first 5-6 months riding the train. I still have my silly feisty days but not nearly like what i'm about to share. I think back on this and think it's funny but also kind of think wow how annoying of me. OK some of my shenanigans were annoying, but others were really kind of nice. Maybe to nice.  Bad girl Shenanigans 1. Hitting The conductor with a ST bus schedule book  2. Blocking the ramp ... And whenever my friends would ride the train, convincing them to do the same.  You can ask any of my friends who have road on the train with me I have some how tricked and convinced them to block the ramp from the conductor.  Yeah... It always fell back on me. Every gosh darn time 3. Giving all  of the conductors and engineers nicknames. Some of them... Not so nice.  The best one was the one that I gave one of the engineers and I don't even know how I came up with it. I called him a "little twerp" all of his coworkers loved it so we ended up sticking. The sad thing is that's probably the nicest one i came up with. Twerp and I are good friends now. Once I learned he was a rail fan too I started calling him by his real name  The next best one is the floating conductor who fills in on all of the different trains his most recent nickname  is... "Special K" like the cereal. Lol. That's way better than his last nickname though. Haha it was not so nice. But I have to think special K because special K told the twerp that I was a railroad fan. So now I have someone to interact with about the railroad.  #iamabadgirlareallybadgirl  4. Pushing the limits to see how far I can take it until I get in trouble. Lol this game is fun. Is pretty much why they call me the princess because as long as I'm not posing a saftey threat I don't get in trouble.  5. Crawling around on the Sounder floor acting like a cat.  I learned relatively recently that's after I acted like a kitty cat on New Year's Eve that the conductor went and told the other conductor back at the yard about how I was acting like a cat on the train. So I ended up showing that conductor how I could act like a cat. Lol. She laughed a bit but I don't think she was as amused as my trains passengers and employees were.  6. Asking  if I could borrow the conductors pen, not really needing to use it so writing the train number on your hand just so you can hold it over your head and ask him if he wants it back and then ask him how it feels to want it back and laugh about it.  When he responds with  "pretty darn good"  there will never be a better response. It can't be topped.  Some of my more respectful shenanigans include 1 making the railroad employees cookies and giving them cards to go with them for hollaween.  2. Giving them Christmas cards and gifts Although they would rather me save my money for retirement and not spend it on them LOL 3. Occasionally not being a pain in the ass.  I haven't even told you guys yet about fair enforcement. Yes I am on good terms with them too I always get my orca checked first because it's my favorite. I think my favorite used to be sarcasm but now it really is my favorite mainly because their big scary security people and people are usually mean to then. So I like being able to make their day.  I am good friends with the station agents and when there are too many scary people around I can always convince ST security to escort me down to the train to be sure I get there safe and sound.  I feel like I often just float around end it don't matter to anyone. But writing the train makes me feel special and important and it really does make me feel like royalty. So I would really like to thank all of the passengers and ST and BNSF employees for watching out for me keeping me safe and playing my games day in and day out. You guys really are the highlight of my life and my very long dayss. You guys make all of this work while and I am so honored to have you all in my life as my friends.  You guys can keep up with me on here as well as on Instagram @sounderprincesskels And on twitter &acrazytrainlady And  the # hashtag #SounderLife on Facebook and all other social media sites provided above.  I hope you enjoyed my blog and enjoy my photos.  Thanks followers Smooches Kels

June 30, 2016

Omg Today on Sounder Life  Okay wow people... wow  seriously southline dude? Were you born yesterday or something.?  Garrett told y'all this was the 1702 going northbound to Everett like 5  freaking times  and also this track change thing is clearly posted on www.soundtransit.org/alerts and they've texted us prior to the change  so yeah  quit being distracted pay attention and don't get rude with the conductour and swear at him  and passengers trying to help you  I mean I am sorry you have to go to Edmonds and take the bus back to downtown  and that you by then will have missed all the other trains south but still you like admitted you were listening to music and not paying attention  be greatfull that nice passenger is gonna drive you to Lynnwood transit center   Also what the hell happened at the platform at king street Station? Someone shot glass windows Out? okay then   Anyway.... Bye

Me back in January 2016 I will go out, steal birthday cakes From babyface.I will go out, steal the piñata,If I wanna. All that really matters is love, But if it's all that you really care about,Then tough. I'm all out, for the war. I guess love I what I'm looking for.I don't care when you cry. I think self pity is a state of mind. I'm so hard. I'm so hard. I'm so hard. She's so hard. She's so hard. She's so hard.  And maybe you're just too good for me, good for me. Or maybe you're just no use to me, use to me.  I'm all out, for the war.  I guess love wasn't what I'm looking for.  I don't care when you cry.  I think self pity is a state of mind.  I'm so hard. I'm so hard. I'm so hard.  She's so hard. She's so hard. She's so hard. She's so hard from the jezabels EP album Dark Storm  boy was I ever obsessed with this album back at the beginning of the year  my two favorite songs on the album are dark storm and she's so hard   So today at work I was listening to music while folding paper  and shes so hard came on  I think I played it like 4 times in a row as I sat there folding paper and reflecting  I was thinking about the person that I was back at the beginning of the year and with July 1st quickly approaching in less than like 4 hours I was just thinking about how much a person can change in just 7 months sometimes a person can grow and sometimes a person just realizes who they really are and starts being himself   Just a quick flash back to January I still lived in Arlington with my former  roommate   I had a treacherous commute from Arlington to the Sounder train station in Everett and then I took the train to Seattle  I had to get up at 3:45 every single morning  ugh   I hated packaging training kits and I wanted a change  I thought packaging training kits was boring  like super boring  my favorite part of packaging was getting to work with treiva my work besty and Lyle  otherwise I thought packaging was just totally stupid   I felt like I could relate to the song she's so hard because it reminded me of me it reminded me of my crazy train Behavior and it reminded me of being so overly blunt and difficult with people and being bratty all the time   Now looking at June 2016 I like to sit on the train and play on my tablet  I don't make up mean nicknames anymore for the conductors  I think that crawling around on the floor like a kitty cat is really really stupid  I don't hit the conductor with books anymore or any other item for that matter  I still say really sarcastic things and call him stupid and dude on occasion but I grew out of all of those games  I just want to talk about normal stuff now and be more normal and fit in with the other commuters.  but I am still the princess don't forget it   At my work we don't have training kits 2 package anymore  when we still had them I thought they were totally boring but now I miss them because they were the first job I ever learned how to do at my job and it makes me go back to a Time when I guess I felt like I was adjusting to my life and I thought that I knew who I was  the same reason I like the song she's so hard so much. I just hate change   I have definitely changed since January I like to focus on my work and be quiet I like to chit chat but I also like to do my own thing I like to read books I like to listen to my music and I like to just kind of focus on what I'm doing less talking more working  same goes for on the train  I still love the train so much butt my Shenanigans are so freaking 6 months ago I mean seriously I am way too old to be playing kitty cat  I'm sure the passengers think I'm insane  lol  now things that used to scare me don't scare me anymore like Freight traffic doesn't scare me anymore not even mudslides scare me anymore they're just annoying because I have to take the special bus instead of the train  I guess I'm not so hard anymore  okay I am definitely not so hard anymore I'm all mushy and disgusting and I just like to be quiet and think about rainbows and unicorns and do my work  and be a good girl on the train.   Back when I started working and at the first part of the year my life was definitely a dark storm but now I would say that it is definitely looking brighter  I see a bright white cockatoo and I Ponder its shadow  and how it rips me off my feet and wakes me from my time to sleep shadow  and from the sky it speaks to me  the new me   Anyway I just really enjoyed that few minutes of reflection today thinking about my growth and how a person can change but you know what I wouldn't change any of this for the world I am so glad that I can listen to that song and think about being a brat and smile about it   I will share the link please take a listen to this song I hope you like it as much as me   And if you dare check out the jezabels Dark Storm EP album and check out the song Dark Storm is well   Here's to change and growth and never giving up  because I'm so hard... I'm so hard... I'm so hard  she's so hard by the jezabels https://youtu.be/bpoHbRFlssI

September2016

Hello everyone, Wow so far we are off to an interesting start to the week in Sounder land. Yeah… I don't even know where to start and it's only freaking Monday. That's scary.  Anyway, this morning was Just the typical AM battle. Garrett telling me to eat my muffin that i got for breakfast. I ended up eating like oh half of it. But at least I hate some of it . A muffin sounded really good at two in the morning. But then when 615 rolled around it really didn't sound good anymore. Lol of course. And then we got into this big thing about breakfast about how it's the most important meal of the day blah blah blah. He told me that he likes oatmeal and a bunch of other stuff I don't remember because honestly it was too early to remember. I said to him would you actually get up at the crack of ass and make breakfast like bacon and eggs and stuff. He said if he had time he would. Oh brother. Yeah I know it is way too early for breakfast.  and he continued his little shenanigan from Friday. tormenting me about my choice of reading materials cuz its "railroad garbage" and he told me I was kicked off . Lol boh Garrett.  allthough this morning i sat next to this sweet old guy who wanted to know all about the train and was very kind about my stamina to come to work in spite of my challenges. Got him all set with a schedule and headed up to the link to head to seatac. I feel really good cuz I made a difference in someones day. And ate my breakfast. Back on the subject of breakfast that guy walked on the train as Garrett and I were still having the breakfast conversation. I asked the guy if he wanted to get up at four in the morning and make bacon and eggs. He was totally all over it LOL. What is it with you people and breakfast? I'm good thank you.   So I said in my last post that I had a big announcement so here it is...  They just had their bid and so now all of the conductors and engineers are being moved around., starting next week the 1703-1702 conductor will be Tommy. Our engineer is going to be Dennis.  Garrett is moving to the 4th train. (Last train) that's my big announcement lol. Lame right? Anyway I signed up for classes with Meg after work so some days I will actually be writing the last train in the afternoon. Congratulations to me.  Anyway this afternoon was interesting. I met this lady on the link light rail headed from Mount Baker transit center to Westlake Station so that she could get on the five 10–5 12 to head to Everett Station to get to the bus to go to Arlington. I asked her if she had ever use the sounder before? She said no so I told her I would take her so she could try it out and she was very excited. When I got down to the train platform with the lady I saw Catherine a.k.a. Katie the station agent. She had a trainee with her. She was all woo woo freaking woo about how I was her girl. She was telling the trainee that the second train it's my favorite train.I had to correct her and tell her it's not anymore. That it's still a great train but not my favorite. And she promised me she thing happy birthday on the microphone on my birthday to the whole platform.  Then I got on the train and told Garrett about the lady that I had brought to the sounder and recruited. Then I reminded him about link light rail guy this morning. I told him he should give me his job. He pretended to call his boss LOL what a dork. He stood there pretending to type numbers on his phone and then he put it on his ear and started pretending to talk about how I should get his job. Lol that is so hilarious. I told him about my Halloween costume and how I was going to dress up like a Train Conductor. He thought that was kind of weird I think he asked me why I didn't want to be an engineer and then I just started laughing.  So who remembers my friend Brook? I told you guys about her on Friday. Me and her exchanged numbers because we are totally going to hang out sometime. She gave me a rolled up newspaper and that sure made for some interesting fun. We were being very interesting today. The best part besides Garrett pretending to talk on the phone was when Brook asked him what kind of classes they had to take to become a conductor and he was telling her about the book full of rail road rules and protocol and I told him I wanted to read it. He was looking outside the door but I could tell he was giving me a scary look like what is wrong with you you're broken. Lol. I almost had to be kitty agsin. Brook wanted me to but I did not want to be a kitty but it was funny that she was encouraging it but I didn't dare go there. Oh also Brook and garrett were making fun of me because I didn't know how to spell the word conductor. Lol. It's kind of a weird word anyway… Anyway… Happy Monday now we get up and do it all again tomorrow.   Anyway… Brook wanted me to be a kitty again. Scary scary. And so 2015. #sounderlife #Commuting #JustAnotherGoodQualityMonday

Hello everyon,  Happy Wednisdsy.  Yesterday at work I had meetings meetings meetings I found out I'm staying with Melissa Hudson the night before my procedure next month on my eyeballs. Oh and Myself Brook and Niki from the sounder (second train 1702) are going to have a girls night out to celebrate Niki's birthday in a week or two. We exchanged all of our phone numbers and everything. And they are going to surprise me for my birthday too. I love these girls so much. Look at me everyone I'm so cool. I'm coordinating this whole ordeal. I'm so excited. Look at me and how I'm a grown-up now with my grown-up commuter friends. Four to the floor In the state of the art Our feet come down in pattern. And do you feel the rage? I'm so glad you came Oh, feelings are natural. When you're flying low over cities of loveOver cities of dreams, yeahWhen you're watching the waves in country towns....That are amazing When you get in the vibe When you're moving inside When you know what I mean, yeah When you getting the vibeWhen you're moving inside...catch me... In The cities that I love... And in the towns that I love. And, oh, let it go What you know What they sayFall in love with the world over again Eating alone and in tribes tastes amazing Eating alone, and watch it grow. I am on my way to seattle TO attend the benefits fair at work. Then ride the train with my friends. Thinking of going live at 4:15 if anyone wants to watch. Right now i'm on the double decker bus headed to downtown. Its soo cool. #CatchMe #GirlsNight #SounderFriends

Well.... No more anticipation. He's gone he's gone but he ain't dead and gone. Joe's gone he's gone but he ain't dead and gone. Garrett's gone, he's gone, but he ain't dead and gone either. Tommy's here. Its over. Garrett's officially on his new train starting now. Train Number 4. Which sometimes I will be riding. Today, He departs in an hour. I thought about jumping his train since we have little to no work but I still got on Tommy's anyway just to prove to myself i'd be ok. I am kinda relieved actually. Now the fear is over. I don't have to feel scared about it anymore. Its about as bad as It can get. Its an up hill battle from here on out. The acaeiest thing that could happen in my world of Sounder Life happened.  No other way to go but up now.  I am so greatful to my friends on the 1702 (second train, and my mom, and everyone who's helped me through this difficult transition. It's gonna be ok.  The Book Mississippi Flood. -it's gone, but it ain't dead and gone Let your tears turn to rivers and carry you away. No more livin in the past. To all my friends and family. This ones for you. Click here Thank y'all. Chat soon. 

A lot has changed over the years. Now it is 2020 and everything is so ugh different now. For one, I don’t play kitty anymore and I honestly don’t know why I did that attention seeking behavior to start with. Secondly, Garrett knows now everything. He knows so no need for anymore mind games. And instead of dumbass attention seeking behavior I learned if I act correctly then I can get attention from the staff and be trusted rather then acting like a child.

I also understand that in Railroad land nothing stays the same forever and it all comes down to choices. They will move train to train but that doesn’t mean that they are leaving me.